Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Time flies

Somehow finding a voice again has to happen.  Hate falling into shut downs.
Things have gotten to a point (again) were life is just in get through it all mode, day after day.  At least this time the weight issue is not taking a hit.  Twenty pounds off this summer, and hoping it keeps rolling off.  It is what I am holding on to.  Just keep thinking tomorrow will bring that spunk back and then post, reply to others posts and be in the game all around.  Just does not seem to come.  Have to try and make it.  School started this week and with it came the OCD and anxiety in my son (full force).  Even with all the great changes he made over the summer and how well he was during it.  How can it be the same kid, how can it be changed?  Seeing it happen like someone flipped a switch was a very hard slap in the face.  I want the guy that was there all summer to walk through those doors.  Counseling did not help last year and he does not want to go back.  Wish it was his senior year instead of junior. I think he will be much happier in college.  
Still trying to find a different way to be with all the situations (son, dh mid life crisis and grandparents).  The present being is not working.  Thought as you get older you get wiser, it all seemed much easier in past years.  I seem to have less answers and feel less happy in this body.  Going off to the gym (the happiest place right now) and burn some of this off.   
You do not have to be the leader if you have the heart to come from behind. ~from the pool message board the other day (like to think or the purpose to keep at it) 

Rock out who you really are in your heart. ~from yoga journal (now to try and tap back into it)

1 comment:

Diane, Fit to the Finish said...

Great job on the 20 pound weight loss. You must feel really good about that!

Keep going strong!